Wednesday, 3 October 2012
Our Folks: Being a team with your partner
Sometimes the bloke and I are a terrible team, we fight, we're both very stubborn and we can be very, VERY different. He was the kid who did his homework on a Friday night so he could enjoy the weekend; I was the kid ringing someone up on Sunday evening because I couldn't remember what it was.
However, sometimes between us we actually get things sorted out! We managed to plan a pretty awesome wedding, and we are bringing up a kid.
Obviously I'm no expert, but I have to write about something, and my experience, Psychologies magazine subscription and listening ears tell me that teamwork involves:
Being true to your own wants/ needs and not pretending to be something you're not. I'm thinking of the woman who insists she doesn't want children (until she's 5 years into her marriage and bored with her husband) and the bloke who is "ready to settle down and doesn't want to party anymore" (and then runs out on his wife because he's bored).
Hopefully a partner will listen to your wants, and you need to be ready for theirs. And you have to be ready for the fact that this could change. People change over a lifetime, and chances are you'll need to reassess the relationship time and time again.
It takes guts to say how you feel to someone, and guts for them to reply. It takes guts to admit how you see your life panning out, and how you imagine your partner fitting in to that. It's brave to put your faith in another person, and it's brave to trust them.