Skip to main content

Midlife CWISIS

I don't know if I'm officially "mid life" (OK well I totally am, considering 74 would be really good going considering my love of cheese and wine), and it's not really a "crisis" as such, more a dull wondering of what the F do I do now, and that kind of stuff.
I'm not a "millenial" technically, but I am a slow learner and matured late, if at all, so I think I have some "millenial" tendencies.
And one tendency right here is thinking
"Oh gosh, oh poor me, I don't really know what I'm doing with my life, and all I really want to do is run away and live in a hut on a beach and look good in a bikini and for my life to have meaning..."
So I am very aware of that, just so ya know. It's a bit of a First World Problem (wow I use a lot of stupid phrases) to need meaning to your life and want more. Just bloody keep your family alive and get on with it already.
BUT... I'm getting a definite sense of... is it all over, you know? And I am very much a person who loves the thrill of the chase, the anticipation BEFORE Christmas, or the wedding, or whatever. Seriously, I get so annoyed if my husband books a holiday because I love just poring over pictures and brochures for months and months just IMAGINING what could be. Looking at all the places and dreaming is all the fun for me. That IS a FWP isn't it? I remember an old friend who had four holidays a year and said "holidays are important to me", as if they weren't important to someone who couldn't afford them! What a laugh. I sound like her now, Damn.

Anyway now I'm shacked up, have a kid, have had a career (wasn't great), have had friends (making more is work), and now I'm just a bit... Meh. (see, millenial, I told you.)

Does that count as a crisis?

Anyway, I really think there should be more, and I want to do more with my time on the old planet. So I'm resurrecting the blog to keep track of what I'm going to do. I'm not sure quite what that is yet, but it will possibly involve veganism, feminism, Oh god this sounds terrible... Fuck it, there will also be sharks and cake.
I've always wanted to go in one of those cages with sharks! Can't really promise that though.


Popular posts from this blog

Going Vegan, Three steps forward...

A few years ago my husband and I (because apparently I'm the Queen) decided to become "weekday vegetarians" and only treat ourselves to carcasses at the weekend. This decision came from various discussions and also reading and watching some things.

I'm not pushy about it to other people at all, but I also try not to engage in arguments unless they have seen:
Forks Over KnivesVegucatedWhat the Health Or read: How Not To Die- Dr Michael GregerEating Animals- Johnathan Safran Foer At the time of watching all these things I was fascinated and borderline obsessed with these things I, a fully grown adult woman (some might say overgrown) had no idea about. Such as, how do cows make so much milk? What happens to male baby chicks? Why don't we eat dog?
When I wasn't pondering naive questions out loud, I was googling the answers, and finding a lot of information which was not pretty. This is another one of these "conventional" things we do because we've alw…

10 Ways having a dog is NOT like having a baby

You've all heard it! Here is why it is not the same. Feel free to add some!

1. You can give them away.

2. It is acceptable to lock them in a cage.

3. You can leave them outside the supermarket.

4. Convention says you chuck them in the boot of the car.

5. You feed them by putting a bowl of mush on the floor when you feel like it.

6. Their teeth shouldn't go anywhere near your nipples. Ideally.

7. They don't ask why.

8. You take them to the vet once a year if you're lucky (rather than the doctor every week).

9. When they wake you up at the crack of dawn you can throw them a bone and shout at them to shut up.

10. They don't have to go to god damn awful birthday parties.

Why can't we be friends?

I went for a drive today, for about 40 minutes, through gorgeous countryside and some scenic little villages. As I approached a village I saw a cluster of beautifully kept thatched cottages, then a quaint little village shop, a tea shop and then more thatched cottages. It was all surrounded by lush trees and fields and to be honest, was something straight out of my dreams. Very English, old fashioned.
As I bumbled along trying to observe the 20mph speed limit, I imagined selling our house and somehow finding a tiny yet amazing cottage of our own to move to, and how somehow I would work from home, keep chickens and look out at the view all the time.

I rounded a corner and there was a house with a St George's cross flag proudly flapping in the garden. A couple of doors down there was a Union Jack (on proper flag poles of course, this is no lower class village!) and then I noticed a few posters for a certain political party dotted around. I was so disappointed! I don't want to li…